I'm going to complain so more, so deal with it.

Yesterday, I got an email from David's Bridal announcing that they were introducing their Fall Collection. I quickly scampered over to the site, and realized that my Orange Floral theme was being phased out. The bridesmaid dresses that I wanted (for 1/2 of my party) were no longer listed as a bridesmaids dress, though is still in the "Special Occassion" dresses. And the shoes to match - gone. Invitations and the Flower Girls dress are still there.

So, realizing I'd have to get my party there to try on dresses ASAP, I sent out a text to the party + Mom. That was my first mistake. I get an email from my Mom with a picture of a long flowy Orange dress saying that we should just have everyone wear this dress, because she doesn't think my bridesmaids should be wearing a short dress if I'm wearing a long dress. I don't know where or why this logic entered her brain.

I explained to her that it was that orange floral dresses that inspired the theme for this wedding, and without those, then there would be no point in keeping orange as my color at all. She didn't respond.

I'm fully aware that we might get in the store, get all the dresses on, and I might hate it. Fine. That'd be MY CHOICE, though. I really hope this is not the case, as the picture in my mind is one that I really love.

I know that certain members of my family are not a fan of the idea I have. The orange, the strapless floral. It becomes difficult when those people are more outspoken and I'm the pleaser. I don't want to give in and give up my idea because of their personal preferences. It is my wedding. I need to keep telling myself this.

Josh was going to come with me, be my rock, my sounding board, and be there in case all of this does fall apart, and we have to start from scratch. Here is where complaining point #2 comes in.

Josh is leaving for work for 2 weeks. 2 weeks! He has to go to Detroit to oversee the cast while they shoot the episodes for the show. Beth, the girl that was supposed to go, can't go due to family obligations. Funny how that never seems to be an option for Josh. So, he leaves next Monday and doesn't return until July 13. Which means he won't be there for what I know will be a hellish bridesmaid dress day, and he won't be here for 4th of July.

I know he has to go - it's the smart thing for him to do. The per diem he'll get alone will be the down payment for either the photographer or the DJ. And that's on top of his normal pay, plus whatever overtime he gets for weekends, etc. It just sucks! I'm not looking forward to it.

It was the complete opposite of what I wanted to hear after the previous nights conversation. That inkling of knowing that maybe we aren't as close as we should be, and wanting to work on fixing that, and now, we'll be apart for 2 weeks.

I'm not worried that our relationship is in jeopardy at all. We still love eachother more than we can imagine, and we can't wait to start our lives together. But like all relationships they take work, and this is something I want to work on and fix so that it doesn't grow and grow into something that could be harmful to our relationship down the line.

For us, for the wedding, it's what we have to do. For us, as a couple, not the best timing.